Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Inspiration

I am my worst enemy, learned the perfect defense from the hedge-hog
Basically someone gets too close, I envolop myself in a shell putting out spikes. I realize that, I do it on purpose. but omg when someone believes in you so much that they're willing to get hurt by the spikes just so they can help you out.

It is my duty, I had no other choice but to listen and act. My couzin has surpassed depression, and he's been trying to help me fight it. I struggled.

Depression is you, all your intellegence keeps you down. It is custom tailored to you, it is your equal, it is you.
Have you seen lord of the rings when smeegle talks to his alter ego? depression is pretty much the same, it is your other self. It is your censored self suppressing your full potential.

My god my spikes hurt, my couzin went through them and decided to get hurt just to pull me out of depression, just to show me a better alernative, a better life.

One thing I can tell all the depressed people out there. Depression is curable. And it is just worth it to cure it. Umm consider this, it is your duty as a human to be happy in this life. I know depressed people can't relate but it is important to recognize this.

I owe it to my couzin to fight my depression all out now, no excuses. I just didn't care, not caring is a part of depression that should be fought actively.

Screw the past, everyone we all did mistakes in our pasts, don't you see people around you are happy? You deserve to be happy as any of them. You are valueable, your sense of happiness is there, but its censored by your depression. Thats important to note. Everything revolves around each human and their happiness, this is whats engraved into our own beings.

Now, the real fight begins. I am seeking a psychologist's help. I'll keep you guys posted. But I have one thing for depressed people. I can't be there to motivate you. Motivate yourself and just fight it. It is a tough fight. But if you want to unlock your potential, you must do it. Else you'll be wasting your life. Thats not the right path for you nor for anyone.

Just like when the teacher asked the student: "WHAT DO YOU WANNA DO WITH YOUR LIFE?"

The answer simply was:

I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANT TO ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)

TURN IT DOWN YOU SAY,
WELL ALL I GOT TO SAY TO YOU IS TIME AND TIME AGAIN I SAY, "NO!"NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
TELL ME NOT TO PLAY
WELL, ALL I GOT TO SAY TO YOU WHEN YOU TELL ME NOT TO PLAY,I SAY, "NO!"NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
SO, IF YOU ASK ME WHY I LIKE THE WAY I PLAY IT
THERE'S ONLY ONE THING I CAN SAY TO YOU

I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANT TO ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)

THERE'S A FEELIN' THAT
I GET FROM NOTHIN' ELSE AND THERE AIN'T NOTHIN' IN THE WORLD THAT MAKES ME GO!GO! GO, GO, GO, GO, GO!
TURN THE POWER UP
I'VE WAITED FOR SO LONG SO I COULD HEAR MY FAVORITE SONG SO,LET'S GO!GO! GO, GO, GO, GO, GO!
WHEN IT'S LIKE THIS I FEEL THE MUSIC SHOOTIN' THROUGH ME
THERE'S NOTHIN' ELSE THAT I WOULD RATHER DO
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANT TO ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANT TO ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANT TO ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK! (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANT TO ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
ROCK (ROCK)
I WANNA ROCK

Source: Darklyrics.com Twisted Sister I wanna Rock

And we're gonna be rocking loud... rest assured

13 comments:

Navy Girl said...

i know this is totally not related .. but bear with me a little .. do you know Kurt Cobain ??


sorry if that sounded a bit inconsiderate.. but trying to cheer ya up :P so why are you depressed ? I believe that there is always a reason behind depression .. maybe if you tried to know whats the problem and tried to solve it .. it would eventually fade away .. if you feel like seeking help .. then by all means .. just go for it … there is nothing wrong with that .. and it might help you out for real .. I wish you the best … cheer up :)

Cosmictree said...

Kaos!
The Cousin!
Panic!
E-blogging!
Depression!
Loneliness!
Music!
Me!


Aywallah!...

Unknown said...

That's it, one day at a time. Keep on rockin.

Shoush said...

Kaos, this is really impressive.. MASHALA, MASHALA, MASHALA (not to jinx u :P). U shud keep going with this optimistic attitude. A9lan imbayin. I felt a change already min ur tone ib ur comments. It's showing. Wala am proud of u. In situations like this, a person can't do it on their own. U need at least one person to be there and push u to go forward, pick u up when u fall, and cheer u on to keep going.

Allah ysahil 3alaik inshala and u get thru all this. With this positive attitude and hope and faith in urself, in no time depression will be just a word to u. Something from ur past oo 5ala9.

Touché said...

A true inspirational post and a tribute to the jewel in your life.

Glad that managed to pull yourself together, out of your depression and setting your mind towards new horizons.

Kaos said...

1st lemme just say thank you everyone for your encouraging messages.

Navy Girl: lol no reason to think that was inconsiderate. It is the case that there are pre-desposing factors that lead to depression. and now I am seeking professional help to take care of them. Cheer up I shall after I defeat that wicked monster.

Sherry: That kinda sounded concerning Sherry.

N: Rocking it is :)

Shoush: Jizach Allah khair shoush, thank you so much. This optimistic attitude wasn't internal, but I don't even care about that anymore. The fact is I am in the middle of the fight now with the determination to defeat it. I really appreciate your support throughout.

touche': Thank you for your encouraging words touche' but am at the beginning of the fight. However as long as that am determined to win I will win :)

Desert-Roses said...

Your so smart...
:)

This should be piece of cake..I wanna email u a thing..I found it very interesting..I know you will relate it to this topic u wrote...or at least u will be able to relate it...hope I find ur email there... tc

Hope said...

Please stay strong and do not rely solely on medications that a professional might recommend.

I once was diagnosed with depression due to a chemical imbalance and I was given medications; they only made me feel worse. All I had to do was change my lifestyle and maintain good amount of stress. If you any questions regarding this, you can ask me :)

Kaos said...

Desert roses: still waiting on the e-mail :)
Thank you in advance though

hope: I am actualy interested to hear more about your experience. I think you might have had what they call a reactive depression which is not like the unipolar or the bipolar in that it shouldn't be treated w/ drugs. Different drugs also have different effects and doctors use trial and error to figure out the type that suits every person. But changing your lifestyle and excercising and stuff always helps in depression. Again I'd like to hear more about your experience and I hope you overcame depression for good.

Hope said...

Hi Koas,

Shoot me an email and I will let you know anything you would like to know :)

L.R.643 said...

depression..most of us have been there, and some of us are still in the process of overcoming it..but it's nice to know that there's someone out there willing to listen.

Wishing u the best of luck kaos and u shud know that ur not in this alone;)

L.R.643 said...

because u dont have a contact me tab, nor an email posted.. i have no other choice but to ask u this question in the comments section of this post: Does going to a psychologist really help?

Anonymous said...

God bless you, Kaos, for persisting with this message. I love it where you said we all make mistakes. We get second chances. Mood elevating drugs make life worth living again, no different than taking insulin for diabetes, it keeps you alive. Thanks be to God.

We all get sad from time to time. Depression is different, it is crushing and it is relentless. Keep telling them, Kaos, to get help. You can't beat it alone.